In my struggles to get back into drawing, I redrew a nine-year-old illustration of two dancers. This illustration was inspired by two dance movies, Save the Last Dance directed by Thomas Carter and Shall We Dance? directed by Peter Chelsom.

To improve from the first illustration (bottom) to the newer (top) I’ve considered what I wanted the original image to express; two dancers in love. I achieve the “in love” part of the drawing with the intimate look between both characters. From there, I considered everything I’ve read about capturing motion in illustration to come up with their poses.

I thickened the outer line work with the newer illustration, but comparing it to the older one, I might’ve gone a bit too thick.

But I’m finished. And as much as my mind wants to focus on what doesn’t work after the fact, I do like changes made. I can go so far as to say I still enjoy looking at the original.

……….

I have an identity crisis. My life and career involves around the Hospitality Industry. I have A secured job, pretty decent savings despite a few major mistakes. I am very content and fortunate for what I have.

The problem lies in how I see myself. I’m a creative person who wants to do work that combines my love of art and math. I see myself in a career, whether side-gig or full-time, with potential. I see myself as a very frugal even though I still have bouts with wasteful spending. I see myself as organized and meticulous especially when it comes to my art and work life, yet my actions are far from it. Who I am is not how I see myself.

Being an artist is part of my identity. I started blogging because it was another method to promote my art. But when I’m not drawing – yet alone blogging about my work – I’m contradicting the identity I want to become. What am I doing wrong?