I have thirty-two hours a week, on average, of free time.
I unwind from my busy schedule during those hours. Or I use that time to reorganize my life, clean my apartment, and socialize with family and close friends.
The amount differs with every interruption and lag. But those hours are the norm.
Thirty-two house are what I have to go by for this art pursuit to work.
In Dispatch x002 I talked about what and how I will practice to improve my drawing skills. To see those routines through, I have to consider when I’m capable of doing the work. This has been the least of the two biggest barriers.
Mornings are ideal because it’s before other commitments get in the way. Mornings are when my mind is clearest and my energy is at its highest. Drawing at the end of the day is possible, but I have to fight against lethargy to get anything drawn.
What makes my mornings so difficult to maintain is my phone addiction. I love YouTube and other forms of entertainment, and my phone feeds the addiction. Without it, going to bed early and rested would be simple. And going to bed early ensures my mornings are relax and focused.
I have a stronger reason to kick that habit this time around. I won’t be able to promote myself as an artist if I don’t post. And I can’t post if I’m not drawing. So I will kick this addiction and track the gradual progress in future posts.
Sixteen years ago I was capable of pursuing an art career.
I landed my first job at nineteen and moved into an apartment a year later. That job covered my living expenses while having disposable income to invest in my art. My apartment was large enough to create a small but dedicated art space. Developing a fanbase with my art would take some years before my art could support me, so this beginning was perfect.
Also, I love my job. I still had the stamina to create outside of my 40-hour work week.
But what I was capable of never manifested. Many internal behaviors and habits fizzled my creative pursuits.
No execution to any goals I set for myself.
No discipline even after learning how to be a professional artist.
Doubt inspired by weeks and months I didn’t draw.
Allowing pleasures and distractions to take the fore front of my life.
The art supplies, books, recorded lectures, and notes became nothing but decoration pieces in the apartment of someone who didn’t do art.
Sixteen years can turn a beginner, no-name artist into a well known professional. A draftsman earns a Bachelor’s Degree and intern experience in half the time. To do nothing within the same period is as close to a failure as anyone can be.
The choice I made sixteen years ago gave me the life I live now. I chose to be a spectator of art when I wanted to be an artist. I chose to only consume when I found fulfillment in creating. I lax on many wonderful opportunities. I now live the results of those choices.
The greatest lesson learned from Brian Tracy’s most famous book Eat That Frog, and a recent read, The Art of Practice by Laido Dittmar, was to do hard things first. Barbell Squats are the hardest weight workouts I could perform. At work, updating lists and files are the most difficult because it’s incredibly boring. Art is hard since I don’t draw enough; but if I were to pick its greatest difficulty, extending my drawing time past an hour would be it.
That time needs to be filled with difficult techniques to take me out of my comfort zone, but not enough to where I quit out of frustration. Mechanical Drawing and Background are my weakest. Lo and behold, I have an excellent collection of books that focuses on all of my skill issues.
I could spend my entire art career drawing, tracing, and referencing from the Etherington Brothers’ books.
How to Think When You Draw series by the Etherington Brothers is a treasure trove of references and tips for anything you’re trying to learn. Every installment brings new tips and ideas that they already have online for anyone to study for free. I prefer the convenience of books to help curb my internet addiction, and to have the information in one spot.
I followed Dongho Kim some time around work with Superani. I love the way he handles perspectives and environmental drawings
The reviews from YouTubers , and looking at the artist’s work on social media. This book is worth its weight in gold. To many, Jeonghyun overloads you with his insight on drawing the human anatomy, but it’s that intention to detail that makes his artwork look so photorealistic, even when the art style is far from it.
I wish there was an English version!
This anatomy book is a simplified attempt at understanding human anatomy for artist, and he manage to cover every necessary point. I can only wonder what nugget of information is in the written part of the book.
I actually came across the full book shared on social media and downloaded it. But once again, I wanted a physical copy.
This book leans more towards technical drawing than what I’m familiar with. And I didn’t get into it because it required an equal space divider. By the time I could order it, my interest went away. I have a theory that if I practice technical drawing as it should be (draw something to scale), drawing it artistically would be easier.
Now, I have the intention of testing that theory.
I got anxious looking through my book collection to see where to start practicing. But this anxiousness to start has happened before. Beginner’s rush depletes after the first few minutes of drawings. I’ll need to look for ways to make what I draw engaging long enough to internalize the act of drawing again. And since I’m drawing to earn a living, what I draw needs to be attention grabbing and worth owning.
I’ll need a few days to really think of something worthwhile. I should still draw in the meantime. And speaking of drawing, this was the first set of practice I did while taking these pictures. This was a tutorial from How to Think When you Draw Volume 6.
There was a time I would challenge how well my art has progressed over the years. I’ll take an illustration I’ve done (and hopefully dated, which was also inconsistent) and see if I could better recreate it.
I loved doing these illustrations.
Demon Woman with Wings. This is my early attempt at drawing creepy but highly detailed illustrations
It was not just the art that improved; I had a ideal backstory and solid reasons for making the design changes. And my improvements were hard NOT to see.
Each of these shared drawings were done a few years apart from each other. I hate I forgot to write the date of completion on each.
Self-portrait of me in three different age groups.
As I look at them now, I ponder where I would be creatively had I continued to draw more often. If not every day, where would five hours a week take me after sixteen years?
The Demon Woman with Wings was lacking necessary texture design on her outfit and a dynamic posture, but I improved greatly on her proportions. I wanted the self-portrait drawing style to be simple, but my face could’ve looked more like me with practice. These are weaknesses that would’ve corrected themselves within the years I stopped drawing.
I lost a lot of drawing time. Time I’ll never get back. A celebrated artist with an admirable body of work are the ashes of what could’ve been.
Regret has taken its place. I’ve lost more to memory of backlog of ideas compared to what I remember. I am the man in the parable where he buried his talents in fear of losing them. I feel the call of the Master ready to examine what work I done with the talents he gave me.
An antagonist in three different forms, from a story I never fleshed out.
A drawing group started by a great friend. We were trying something but didn’t take time to continue.This is one of the few drawings I’ve put a date on the back. They were drawn a year apart with the left completed on April 28, 2012, and the right on July 16, 2013.Only the drawing on the far left was dated (July 26, 2010). I didn’t know the technique to even out color pencils so I colored very little.
deeintrigue 